Things You Do When the World Isn't Ending
You know, my last blog post started with a commentary on everything happening at once. I am a firm believer that God has a well-developed sense of humor that is heavily based on dramatic irony, because if I thought a lot was going on a couple of weeks ago, I really had no idea what was happening next. Just the other day, I was having a really hard time and crying to a friend, and I said "I wish I could have a break." It seems I needed to be clearer--I wanted a break from the thoughts inside of my head, not everything that distracts me from them.
My college, as many it seems, has decided to go online for the rest of the semester. I understand and agree with the precautions...but I am an arts major. Online classes are tricky in my field, and I am also losing a lot of what makes an arts major so rewarding: so many of my friends have had to stop working and have lost performances of shows they have spent months working on. There was no real closure to any of this--there are people I won't get a chance to say goodbye to. It kind of feels like the world is ending.
It isn't, though. Not yet, not now. So what do I do in the meantime? I'm not sure. However, in the last in person class of my science of positive thinking course, today we were discussing our core values. Our assignment before the next class is to focus on a value that is a top priority for us. In a way, that assignment just became so much more important. The world is changing, but that doesn't mean everything we value has to change to.
What can I do in the meantime? I can continue working on my poetry--the likelihood I'll have something ready for publication by the end of the year just went way up--and allowing myself to play with words and language. I am going to keep reading and learning about drama therapy, that way when things start back up again I'll have more information to take to my mentors and advisers. Who knows, maybe I'll even have a more concrete idea of how and in what ways I can work to help expand the field. I can work like heck on my monologues and musical pieces...hopefully I won't annoy my friends *that* much. Speaking of them, I can work to develop stronger relationships with my friends that are also staying here in Provo. I can focus on my relationship with my Savior and gain a stronger testimony.
I can also, for the first time, focus on my health without the interference of work and school. My mental health is in desperate need of attention, and as much as it stresses me out to pay it attention, I am finally able to allow it to take up the space it needs at the moment. I don't have the opportunity to shy away from it anymore. That is equal parts exciting and terrifying.
I have the next while to figure out who I am aside from being a student. I would invite all of us to learn about ourselves while we have this moment and need for pause. We are human, and thus horribly complex. There is so much inside of us that we just haven't accessed yet because we live in a society that runs too fast for us to keep up. As scary as this all is, perhaps in this forced deceleration, we can find opportunities to explore our minds and selves. There is so much about you worth knowing that you have never given the time it deserves, and now, maybe you have the chance to get to know those parts of you.
Things are crazy. The world is unpredictable, and I can safely say I haven't quite lived through anything like this yet. But so far I have 100% success at living so far, and I intend to do so. The world is not ending. We are not without help. And we are not without each other. I am so grateful to still have so much I can do or be. This too shall pass. We've got this.
My college, as many it seems, has decided to go online for the rest of the semester. I understand and agree with the precautions...but I am an arts major. Online classes are tricky in my field, and I am also losing a lot of what makes an arts major so rewarding: so many of my friends have had to stop working and have lost performances of shows they have spent months working on. There was no real closure to any of this--there are people I won't get a chance to say goodbye to. It kind of feels like the world is ending.
It isn't, though. Not yet, not now. So what do I do in the meantime? I'm not sure. However, in the last in person class of my science of positive thinking course, today we were discussing our core values. Our assignment before the next class is to focus on a value that is a top priority for us. In a way, that assignment just became so much more important. The world is changing, but that doesn't mean everything we value has to change to.
What can I do in the meantime? I can continue working on my poetry--the likelihood I'll have something ready for publication by the end of the year just went way up--and allowing myself to play with words and language. I am going to keep reading and learning about drama therapy, that way when things start back up again I'll have more information to take to my mentors and advisers. Who knows, maybe I'll even have a more concrete idea of how and in what ways I can work to help expand the field. I can work like heck on my monologues and musical pieces...hopefully I won't annoy my friends *that* much. Speaking of them, I can work to develop stronger relationships with my friends that are also staying here in Provo. I can focus on my relationship with my Savior and gain a stronger testimony.
I can also, for the first time, focus on my health without the interference of work and school. My mental health is in desperate need of attention, and as much as it stresses me out to pay it attention, I am finally able to allow it to take up the space it needs at the moment. I don't have the opportunity to shy away from it anymore. That is equal parts exciting and terrifying.
I have the next while to figure out who I am aside from being a student. I would invite all of us to learn about ourselves while we have this moment and need for pause. We are human, and thus horribly complex. There is so much inside of us that we just haven't accessed yet because we live in a society that runs too fast for us to keep up. As scary as this all is, perhaps in this forced deceleration, we can find opportunities to explore our minds and selves. There is so much about you worth knowing that you have never given the time it deserves, and now, maybe you have the chance to get to know those parts of you.
Things are crazy. The world is unpredictable, and I can safely say I haven't quite lived through anything like this yet. But so far I have 100% success at living so far, and I intend to do so. The world is not ending. We are not without help. And we are not without each other. I am so grateful to still have so much I can do or be. This too shall pass. We've got this.
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